Trauma 101
Many people hear the word trauma but aren’t sure what it really means. This page offers simple definitions and explanations — not to overwhelm, but to give clarity.
If you’ve lived through hard things, you may find yourself here with questions. You’re not alone. Understanding how trauma works in the body is the first step toward reclaiming safety and worth.
What is Trauma?
Trauma is what happens when the nervous system is pushed beyond its ability to cope.
When stress overwhelms the system, the body shifts into survival states like fight, flight, freeze, or shut-down. These responses can linger as tension, vigilance, or numbness, even after the stress has passed. Trauma is not just a memory of what happened — it’s how the body and mind continue to carry the impact.
What Trauma Is Not
Not a personal flaw or failure
Not “all in your head” — it shows up in the body too
Not limited to certain kinds of experiences — trauma is about the impact, not the label
What is the Nervous System?
The nervous system is the body’s communicator. It links the brain, spinal cord, and nerves, sending signals back and forth every second of every day.
Some signals are obvious — moving a hand, feeling the sun, hearing music. Others run quietly in the background — heartbeat, breath, digestion.
The autonomic nervous system manages our survival states. When it senses danger, the sympathetic branch speeds us up to fight or flee. When it senses safety, the parasympathetic branch slows us down for rest, repair, and connection.
Like every creature in the wild, humans depend on this balance. Trauma happens when that balance is disrupted and the nervous system keeps signaling danger long after the threat has passed.
The 4 Fs: Survival Responses
When the nervous system senses danger, it doesn’t wait for us to think — it reacts. These patterns are automatic survival strategies, wired into the body:
Fight – meeting the threat with resistance or aggression
Flight – escaping, avoiding, or running from the threat
Freeze – going still or numb; this can range from momentary pause to full shutdown/collapse when no other option feels possible
Fawn – seeking safety through appeasement, people-pleasing, or compliance
Each of these responses is a form of protection. They are not choices or flaws, but the body’s way of keeping us alive.
What is Complex Trauma?
Complex trauma develops when the nervous system faces repeated or ongoing stress — especially in relationships or environments where safety and care should have been present.
It can stem from experiences such as:
Early developmental or attachment disruptions
Religious or spiritual harm
Medical or psychiatric trauma
Generational or systemic oppression
Abusive or neglectful relationships
Over time, these layers shape how we feel, connect, and see ourselves. Yet the same biology that carries trauma also carries the capacity for healing.
Trauma Isn’t “Big-T” or “little-t”
Sometimes people (clinicians included) try to measure trauma: Big-T for dramatic, life-threatening events, and little-t for “smaller” stressors. But trauma isn’t about size. It’s about impact.
Even experiences that look small on the outside — ongoing criticism, neglect, disconnection, or repeated emotional harm — can overwhelm the nervous system just as deeply as what we call “big” traumas.
What qualifies as trauma isn’t determined by how scary or violent something was, but by how it disrupted safety, connection, or the ability to cope — and whether the nervous system has had the space and support to heal.
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Trauma and Resilience
Trauma leaves its mark — in the nervous system, in memory, in the body. But just as the body carries trauma, it also carries resilience.
Resilience is the nervous system’s ability to adapt, recover, and grow stronger after stress. It doesn’t mean avoiding struggle or “bouncing back” overnight. It means finding new ways of responding, supported by connection, safety, and care.
Even after years of repeated stress, the nervous system can learn new patterns. Through healing relationships, embodied practices, and trauma-informed care, resilience grows.
Resilience is not the absence of trauma. It is the presence of recovery.